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My daughter Korynn made me this little jar filled with notes to open at different moments during treatment, when I was feeling bad, when I was about to go to chemo, or when I was feeling sad or hopeless. It didn't change what I was going through, but it gave me a little encouragement to reach for when I needed it most. Sometimes giving grace is simply reminding someone of what you want her to remember on the days it's hardest to remember it herself. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/446fe69a-ef03-469c-9148-55750270ccee/IMG_2859.JPEG How to Give Grace - Say Something - Send the card. I received so many cards throughout treatment, some heartfelt, some funny, some faith-filled, and some with just a few simple words of encouragement. Years later, I still have every one of them. You don't have to know exactly what to say. You don't have to write something profound. Just knowing someone took the time to choose a card, write a note and send it reminded me that I was being thought of and cared for. If you're wondering whether to send the card, send it. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/e88f50d2-48a7-4eff-9908-7527a5da05c2/IMG_1905.JPG How to Give Grace - Say Something - Make it personal. The most meaningful words don't have to be new. During treatment, my grandmother sent me this old sheet music for “My Bonnie,” along with a note reminding me of a memory we shared from years before. She connected something from our past with what I was walking through in that moment. It wasn't just encouragement. It was a reminder of our history, our love and who I was beyond breast cancer. Sometimes giving grace is reminding someone of a memory, a story or a piece of herself that cancer can't take away. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/67e2a6f4-79c2-4249-bda2-3a5e2f36aa29/IMG_2969.JPEG How to Give Grace - Say Something - Leave a note where she'll find it. During treatment, my daughter Korynn hid encouraging sticky notes around the house in places she knew I'd eventually find them, by the coffee maker, with my phone, near my purse. She hid enough that I kept discovering them days later, including one before chemo. They cost almost nothing, but I still remember them years later. Sometimes giving grace is leaving a few simple words of encouragement exactly where she might need to find them. https://www.supportgivegrace.org/how-to-give-grace/make-life-easier monthly 0.5 2026-09-27 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/e484831e-16e2-4b21-a7bc-5701c5f18ddd/IMG_3282.jpg How to Give Grace - Make Life Easier - Help her remember. Before one of my chemo treatments, my oncology team had recommended that I take Claritin. My husband knew I had enough to remember already, so he left it out for me with this note to make sure I didn't forget. It was such a small thing, but that's exactly what made it meaningful. He noticed something I needed to remember and made sure it was one less thing I had to keep track of on my own. Sometimes giving grace is paying attention to the little details and helping carry some of the mental load. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/36a01b03-6256-4fdc-853c-17d3f66cc6e2/IMG_2973.jpg How to Give Grace - Make Life Easier - Make one less thing to think about. During treatment, my coworkers came together and gave us gift cards to some of our favorite restaurants so we could order takeout or delivery on the days when figuring out dinner felt like one more thing to do. It was such a practical gift, but it also made us feel incredibly cared for. They weren't just thinking about me. They were thinking about what might make life a little easier for our whole family. Sometimes giving grace is taking care of one everyday thing so she doesn't have to. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/dbb99d13-c052-44cf-b810-46db4e5d9a1e/IMG_3521.JPEG How to Give Grace - Make Life Easier - Think about the little things. When I came home from my mastectomy, my daughters Camden and Korynn had a snack cart waiting by my chair, filled with snacks and little things I might want while I recovered. They even made a sign for it. It wasn't something I would have thought to ask for, but that was part of what made it so thoughtful. They had thought ahead about what might make those first days at home a little easier and put it right within reach. Sometimes giving grace is anticipating a small need before she ever has to ask. https://www.supportgivegrace.org/how-to-give-grace/bring-a-little-normalcy monthly 0.5 2026-09-27 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/184b89f1-2033-4211-b80d-aba4d7885260/IMG_3173.JPEG How to Give Grace - Bring a Little Normalcy - Bring the fun to her. During treatment, there were times when getting out and doing the things we normally enjoyed just wasn't possible. Our friends knew our family loved escape rooms, so they sent us a game we could do together at home. It had nothing to do with breast cancer, and that was part of what made it so thoughtful. For a little while, we could just do something fun together and feel like ourselves. Sometimes giving grace is bringing a little bit of normal life to her when she can't go out and find it herself. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/10b1d6c1-ca1d-4330-b32f-ea1d1d64e4c8/IMG_3425.jpg How to Give Grace - Bring a Little Normalcy - Give her something to get lost in. One of the gifts I received during treatment was a novel, The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. It wasn't about cancer, healing or treatment. It was simply a good book I could get lost in for a while. When so much of your day can revolve around appointments, medications and how you're feeling, having something completely unrelated to cancer can be a welcome break. Sometimes giving grace is giving her something she can enjoy simply because she enjoys it. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/8c2ec351-856e-4416-927e-118558b77451/IMG_2841.jpg How to Give Grace - Bring a Little Normalcy - Remind her of the things she loves. Our neighbors had a Boston terrier we adored and would sometimes have over at our house. When they moved away in the middle of my treatment, they sent us this Boston terrier pillow. It was such a sweet reminder of them and of something that had brought our family joy during an otherwise difficult time. It had nothing to do with breast cancer. It was simply personal. Sometimes giving grace is choosing something that says, “I know you,” rather than something that says, “I know you have cancer.” https://www.supportgivegrace.org/how-to-give-grace/give-something-thoughtful monthly 0.5 2026-09-27 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/110ae44d-78f9-4ae9-ae87-1c2601754768/IMG_2810.jpg How to Give Grace - Give Something Thoughtful - Give her something to hold onto. A friend gave me this bracelet during treatment. It says “Just Keep Swimming,” a simple reminder to keep going one day at a time. It was small enough to wear every day, but the message stayed with me. Every time I looked at it, I was reminded that someone who cared about me was cheering me on. Sometimes giving grace is giving her a little reminder she can carry with her on the hard days. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/8e4113d5-ff35-4193-b224-0f693301dd46/IMG_2908.JPEG How to Give Grace - Give Something Thoughtful - Think about what might bring her comfort. A friend sent me a beautiful pair of pajamas during treatment. It was such a simple gift, but at a time when I was spending more time resting and recovering at home, they were something I could actually use and enjoy. The gift felt thoughtful because it fit the season I was in. It wasn't just something pretty. It was something that made being at home a little more comfortable. Sometimes giving grace is thinking about what her days look like right now and choosing something that brings a little comfort to them. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/471746a9-102a-4e10-a0d8-850719af9f48/little-box-of-pick-me-ups-still.jpg How to Give Grace - Give Something Thoughtful - Give her something for the days ahead. A friend made me this “Little Box of Pick-Me-Ups” filled with little surprises and envelopes to open at different moments, including one for when I needed a laugh. It wasn't just something I opened once. It gave me little moments of encouragement to reach for along the way, depending on what kind of day I was having. Sometimes giving grace is creating something she can come back to whenever she needs a little lift. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/716732ef-2474-4896-83cc-771a9b4c03f3/IMG_3511.JPEG How to Give Grace - Give Something Thoughtful - Make it just for her. During treatment, someone made this wooden survivor sign especially for me. It had my name, the year and the pink ribbon, turning something I was going through into something personal that I could keep. There was something especially meaningful about knowing someone had taken the time to make something just for me. Sometimes giving grace is creating something that reminds her just how many people are believing in her and cheering her on. https://www.supportgivegrace.org/how-to-give-grace/show-up monthly 0.5 2026-09-27 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/0e8eba2c-215e-4e09-a104-0c633842324c/IMG_10010+%2813%29.JPEG How to Give Grace - Show Up - Be there however you can. When COVID restrictions meant my husband couldn't come inside with me for treatment, he found another way to be there. He parked outside the infusion center where I could see him through the window and held up a sign that said, “I can't be with you, but I'm here loving you!” He couldn't change what I was going through, and he couldn't even sit beside me that day. But he made sure I knew I wasn't alone. Sometimes giving grace is finding a way to show up, even when you can't physically be by her side. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/e93e814c-9b54-4ad1-9014-53bf02dd4d1c/46158DB4-1ED1-4093-8993-4931977CAB3C.jpg How to Give Grace - Show Up - Show up from wherever you are. During treatment, one of my friends came to my house with a collection of posters made by friends who lived across the country. Each one had written their own message of love, encouragement or humor for me. Most of them couldn't physically be there with me, but they found a way to make their presence felt from miles away. Seeing all of those messages together was such a powerful reminder of how many people were in my corner. Sometimes giving grace is finding a way to show up, even when you're far away. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/d2a04808-200a-4bf9-8de1-816c86bb54fe/18854AC7-50D3-49B7-9856-404FE5988E8B.jpg How to Give Grace - Show Up - Celebrate the milestones. When I finished my last round of chemotherapy, my family was there to celebrate with me. After months of appointments, treatments and hard days, having people show up to mark that moment made it feel even more special. They couldn't walk through treatment for me, but they could stand beside me when I reached an important milestone. Sometimes giving grace is showing up for the victories too, not just the hard days. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/19fb47df-6020-437e-9c46-56b406c5d80e/IMG_2159.JPEG How to Give Grace - Show Up - Create a little surprise. One day during treatment, our neighbors surprised me by filling our yard with pink balloons. Each balloon was tied to a handpainted rock with a message of encouragement for me. I walked outside to this entire yard full of reminders that our community was thinking about me and cheering me on. It was unexpected, joyful and something I still remember years later. Sometimes giving grace is creating a little moment of joy where she least expects to find it. https://www.supportgivegrace.org/how-to-give-grace/pray-for-her monthly 0.5 2026-09-27 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/ad578fae-28cc-4275-b114-8fb25f79b730/IMG_3229.JPEG How to Give Grace - Pray For Her - Wrap her in prayer. During treatment, I was given this handmade prayer shawl along with a beautiful prayer written especially for me. It was a physical reminder that someone had taken the time to pray for me and was continuing to hold me in prayer. There were moments when I didn't have the words or the strength for much of anything. Having something I could wrap around myself was a comforting reminder that I was being prayed for even in those moments. Sometimes giving grace is finding a tangible way to remind her that she is covered in prayer. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/9631dc8c-cb51-4eda-b866-f9757492a7ac/IMG_3526.jpeg How to Give Grace - Pray For Her - Share the words when she may not have them. I had to leave home very early the morning of my mastectomy. Before I left, I found this waiting for me from my daughter Korynn. She had written me a letter and included Psalm 23:4–6. On a morning filled with so much uncertainty, those words reminded me that I wasn't walking into surgery alone. I could carry her words with me, and even more importantly, the reminder that God was with me. Sometimes giving grace is sharing Scripture that reminds her of God's presence when she needs it most. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68c9e0faada2892400c3528f/24843903-1a4c-4d91-a273-a4ab3398f118/12.png How to Give Grace - Pray For Her - Remind her that God is with her. Throughout my treatment, my mom would text me Bible verses. Somehow, she always seemed to time them perfectly. So many times I would be sitting in a waiting room before an appointment, anxious about what I might hear or what came next, and a Scripture from her would appear on my phone. She couldn't always be sitting beside me in that waiting room, but those messages reminded me that she was praying for me and, more importantly, that God was already there with me. Sometimes giving grace is sharing God's Word at just the moment she may need to hear it.